I Have To Apoligize!

[phaquetoo]

My name is Jim. Im 47 yrs old, I have been disabled since I was 35yrs old, The toughest thing for me when I became disabled, was not being able to do the simple things in life, like shoveling snow, mowing the lawn with a push mower, swinging a golf club, baseball bat, or being able to sleep in a regular bed!

 

I have been disabled for a lil over 12 yrs, Im sick of being sick! On a daily basis my better half tells me to calm my voice down, when I try to talk, It comes out like a drill instructor giving orders. I dont try to come off this way, it must be my disability! my kids are used to my tone! their friends are not alot of them are afraid of me, untill they get to know me a lil, if they come back? alot of adults think im an A--hole! I have a very short fuse. I dont like it when people think im mean, I have feelings, mostly they are painful feelings! I was raised in a generation that told boys and men not to cry! dont show emotions! bottle it up! be strong! be proud! I was self employed all of my life, I paid my own self employment tax (fica) I employed hundreds of people in my short career! I taught many a trade, that they could take with them and work any where for any one! I dont think im any better than the next guy or gal! I beleive if I can do something any one can!

 

Im very sorry if people on this site think im not a Nice Person! I realized that if I am scaring people with my tone in the real world, than I most likly am not coming off to good on this site! Im trying to be understanding and not pounce on the first person that disagrees with me. I say (type ) things I prob shouldnt some times! Im only human, Im always in pain! I know that I have it alot better than alot of folks on here! My heart goes out to every one of you! I dont wish to share my misery with others, but some times I hurt peoples feelings! Some times I am quick to judge! I dont wish any one any harm, I can forgive and forget, and move on!

 

I would like to thank a few people out there who are caught up in legal nitemare and wish them all G-D's Speed!

Bobandtorrey. marijuana Ranch, Jeff from bad axe. and all the rest of you who have taken up the cause and are not sitting down and taking it, keep the fight going! keep your heads up High, and G-D Bless you and yours!

Peace!

Jim

[monkeypaw]

Hey Phaq, it's time to roll one and pass it to me Dont sound like an donkey rectum to me, we all have bad days. I enjoy reading your posts :)Cheer up, buttercup

[stonecrowe316]

hi jim, i know you feel the need to apoligize,cause i feel that way too at times.but i know too what its like not to be normal,we have talked several times on the phone.your alright in my book.we as sick people shouldnt have say sorry,but the people that arent sick is not gonna know how you or anyone esle feels.my family for example,they have watch me go though this fight of cancer for 10 years,and still take me for granted.they dont know no better.there not sick,all im tring to say to folks is before judging sick people,first walk in thier shoes,try to see the world throgh our eyes.it dont give us a right to be grouchy,but i know when i feel like half a man it gets to me too.try not to be so hard on your self jim, your not alone.for those not sick try to give the sick a break.....god bless all.

[phaquetoo]

Thanks Joe!

 

come check out the chat room!

[phaquetoo]

Jim,

I am new to the site, and don't know you but I read your post yesterday about your son. First I want to say you sound like a caring person to me, congratulations on becoming a grandfather and God Bless your son for what he is doing!!! Also we all say things we shouldn't at times- we all have our bad day's. I can't say I personally know how you feel where the pain is concerned, but I have watched my Father struggle with the same pain you describe for year's. He has his moments where it can be to much, and he needs some alone time or is cross with other's, and we all understand. Don't be to hard on yourself, and just remember even some of us who are not in pain have our day's where we may have other life issue's and come across donkey A**HOLES!!!! God Bless-and Take Care

 

 

Thank you!

Peace and God bless you and yours

[mizerman]

hi jim, i know you feel the need to apoligize,cause i feel that way too at times.but i know too what its like not to be normal,we have talked several times on the phone.your alright in my book.we as sick people shouldnt have say sorry,but the people that arent sick is not gonna know how you or anyone esle feels.my family for example,they have watch me go though this fight of cancer for 10 years,and still take me for granted.they dont know no better.there not sick,all im tring to say to folks is before judging sick people,first walk in thier shoes,try to see the world throgh our eyes.it dont give us a right to be grouchy,but i know when i feel like half a man it gets to me too.try not to be so hard on your self jim, your not alone.for those not sick try to give the sick a break.....god bless all.

No need to explain. I completely understand how you feel. With the rainy weather we have today the pain my wife and I are in is simply excruciating.

I don't think you've ever been "out of line" on this site.

But, I know I have - lol.

We all have our crosses to bear - we all have a vast assortment of ailments which qualified us to get our cards.

Take care and hold your head up high!

Mizerman

[+Silverblue]

Hi Jim, I tried to give you a positive rep but the board won't let me, says I reached my limit, but I just got on here, something's wrong with it. Anyway, we all have our bad days. It takes a lot of courage to admit mistakes, I've sure made my share. I've been disabled all my life and know from others the shock of adjustment when it happens later in life, I acquired another disabilty later in life as well. In reading many of your messages, I can see through the pain and feel the love, especially when you speak of your family. I know how hard it is trying to balance so many feelings, especially when there's so much to be angry about. It's not easy holding all that inside, because it's so hard to find others who will listen, and, even if they can't understand, they could at least show some compassion. I've had days when I snapped at people and couldn't rest till I apologized. It wasn't easy and I was so afraid they'd not accept. It's happened, but still I tried. I was glad to see you on my friend list. Oh I like your pic with the "Wanted" sign on it, I like how you set that up!

 

Peace!

 

Sincerely, Sb

[vender]

Phaq, Keep typing whats on your mind. You have enough to worry about family and pain. If someone on this forum cant realize its a place to discuss.... screw them. I like reading your post.

 

Not sure if this is appropriate but are you on any Opiates? I found that they put a strain on my relationships. When I got off them my pain was still around but my attitude improved. Anyway, I had to find something for pain and my pain Doc now has me on Nubain (not an opiate) which works better for pain.

 

Keep Posting! Your one of the only good reads on this site.

[Guest Marywanna]

You don't have to apologize! EVERYBODY has darn tough days and you are entitled to be angry all you want to. We will pray for your son,our nephew is in Iraq right now too.God Bless and keep all our brave soldiers safe. MW

[Captain Obvious]

I Like Ya B) you tell it like it is with no sugar coating. Im a Big Boy and I can Handle it.

[phaquetoo]

Mizeraman I appreciate your kind words Thank you and Peace!

 

Silver blue I didnt forget about you! Thank you and God bless you and yours!

 

Vender thank you P, P & P

 

Marywanna Peace and thank you also!

 

Cap I know you can take it! I like your posts alot! im a big fan!

 

Thanks every one I realy do appreciate it, I noticed mizerman getting neg ratings for his comments here?!? I gave you one back Ill go find more and hit you up, thanks S.B I realy dont worry about the ratings personaly, On ebay I do! I dont think ill get kicked out for neg ratings here though! lol its all good tomorow is another day! oh cap I raise yours every day bro, just for defecates and giggles! lmao

 

Peace all!

Jim

[+Silverblue]

Hi Jim, when I logged out and logged back in I was able to use the rep feature, I guess there was a glitch in the system. It's important to me to give someone a good rep when they are sincere and trying their best. I know how hard sharing feelings openly is.

 

Sincerely, Sb

[cme1978]

man jim your a great mmma member.peace

[phaquetoo]

Thanks S.B You are pretty Awsome!

 

BlueBerry thank you very much I know you feel me!

 

Cme I think you are Great also, where you been Hiding?

 

Today is another day! I do feel better in my head, thanks to all of you! Im gonna try to be a better person for my family and me! and thank God im off opoids!

 

Puff, puff, and Pass!

Peace

[+Dizledot]

Sounds like you had a bad day??? I've never thought you've come across like an a$$ hole or otherwise. We are all in pain here and sometimes its the pain that speaks and not us. You have made some very kind comments to me and they were much appreciated.So, I like your open minded opinions and keep them coming. Dizz

[phaquetoo]

Sounds like you had a bad day??? I've never thought you've come across like an a$$ hole or otherwise. We are all in pain here and sometimes its the pain that speaks and not us. You have made some very kind comments to me and they were much appreciated.So, I like your open minded opinions and keep them coming. Dizz

 

 

thanks dizz you are awsome! come to the chat room!

[+Dizledot]

thanks dizz you are awsome! come to the chat room!

 

 

Chat Room has been busy today....will catch you another time

[MightyMightyMezz]

Dude, you're one of the greatest characters on the board!

[phaquetoo]

Thanks Dizz! You too Mezz!

catch us on the chat in the morning! Im feeling alot better today! Thank You all for Your Support!