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First Post: Diz And Judy And Others...fire It Up.

Guest OxXGarfieldXxO

By Guest OxXGarfieldXxO
in Let's Get Personal (unmoderated)

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Guest OxXGarfieldXxO

Guest OxXGarfieldXxO

Posted
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What do ya know....this forum is the perfect analogy for my love life as well....vacant and empty...lol

 

Hope you all that requested this find it.

 

Let me know if you need anything.

 

Best

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Dizledot Advanced Member

+Dizledot

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Hi there.......single in Michigan.....older woman....looking for friends and mmj friendly people. Any singles in Saginaw, Midland, Bay City, Flint? Us older people need single friends.....

 

 

Hi travelinjudyt....

 

If you get down my way south east area known as Downriver, I have a family member / patient who is looking for a friend.

 

Dizz

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  • 1 month later...
Silverblue Advanced Member

+Silverblue

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Friendship is the best place to start. It'd be nice to find someone I can get to know and see if we might be compatible. I truly believe if anyone wants to be someone's life partner, they should be best friends and take time to get to know each other and know what each hopes to bring to the relationship. It begins with open communication, trust, and respect. Take time to listen, let your friend know what you can give and what you'd like to receive. Listen to what your friend says. If you're unsure of the message, don't be afraid to ask. Don't assume anything, be careful of expectations, these 2 things cause more trouble than anything, because they come from lack of communication. How important is this particular thing to you? WHAT is important to you? What are you looking for, what do you need, will you stay if he or she can't give it exactly the way you want it, can you work it out? Find common interests, spend time together, if you fall in love, keep the romance alive, even after you're married. NEVER go to bed angry.

 

Say, for example, he likes watching the news every night at 6, but you'd like him to cuddle with you instead. Could you cuddle with him while he watches the news? Maybe you hate the news, so you could put some music on and listen with a headset. He gets his news, you get to cuddle. If he wants to go out with his friends, and stays out late, would he mind calling you to let you know he's ok? Will you call him if you're out late, too? What if you share a steak, which he likes medium rare, and you want it well done? Couldn't you split it so his half would be his way and your half would be yours? What if he does something you don't like, can you tell him without making him angry? If something's bothering you, can you talk about it in a calm way that doesn't look like an accusation? Communication is the most important thing, it helps us know if we can trust and respect our partner, it helps us show compassion, listening is part of communication, too. When we hear something, we can say, "It sound s like you're saying...." or, "I feel uncomfortable when you say or do (whatever). If you do get hurt, can you express that? I'd say, "You hurt me, though I know you didn't mean to." How does he know if you don't speak up? Sometimes apologizing is the best way to patch it up, even if you're sure you weren't wrong. Be honest and sincere, tactful and respectful. I know it's hard to do when emotions are strong, but that's the real true test of a relationship. It's all part of the "Getting to know you" process. If this is your best friend, you know he or she would never intentionally hurt you. As long as mistakes are fixed, it'll be ok. I could give tons of examples. I'm not a counselor or any kind of authority, I just speak from experience. After having many failed relationships, I can look back and see what I did wrong. Was I too demanding, assumed wrong, were my expectations unrealistic? Was I strong enough to speak up when I was hurting? Should I have spoken up or kept quiet? See how important communication is? If I cook you a meal and you don't like how I prepare it, how can I make it to your liking if you don't tell me your preferences? If you don't like my perfume, will you tell me? I could get into more personal matters, but these ideas can be adapted to those, too. How much do you want, how much can you give, how do you like it? Do you like children, do you want children? Would you adopt a child? Do you like animals? Would you mind if I open the window, should I turn the music down, can we go out dancing sometimes, do you like games, like scrabble, cards, video games, puzzles, monopoly, pool, etc. Would you like some time to yourself? Can we do community volunteering together? Could we help clean up a highway together, help out with a cause, go to a movie, go for a drive, help a sick friend, take care of their place if they go to the hospital, be at a hearing, is something bothering you? Can you talk about it? Are you happy? I LOVE YOU!

 

Remember, whoever you are, whoever you're looking for, I hope you'll see the person inside. I'm not the prettiest woman but I'm not ugly either. Recently a man asked me out and said, "I hope you don't mind being with an ugly guy." He's kinda scruffy-looking but he's helpful, considerate, and gentle, and thinks I'm pretty. There's another man I met who seems to like me, and I like him, too, though he doesn't look like someone I'd envision as a husband, BUT I feel very comfortable around him, which says a lot about a person. If I'm not comfortable near them, I know there's a good reason for it. My intuition is very good at telling me who's ok and who isn't. As long as I don't feel compelled to run away from someone, I'll give them a chance. I'm not as comfortable with one man as I am with the other, but I don't think he'd hurt me.

 

I don't need to live in a fancy house, have fancy things, or be super rich to be happy. I see the value in simple things. My health is manageable, I'm not demanding or bossy, I don't interfere or impose, I try not to assume or expect anything, I'm very passionate about some things and hope that even if someone disagrees, we can work something out, I'm sure If we're best friends who know what we want, are willing to express our feelings, needs and concerns, can accept each other with all our limitations as well as our strengths, do our best, appreciate each other and always let that Love shine through, we'll be very happy for a long time.

 

Sincerely, Sb

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Silverblue Advanced Member

+Silverblue

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How is it that there are so many people, yet so many have no special someone to be their companion? No one will fit the idea fantasy in someone's mind, so let's get real. Do you want someone who will do their best to make you happy? Can you give the relationship a chance to grow? Relationships are just like plants, they start with a tiny seed and blossom into something beautiful, but it takes time, patience, dedication and LOTS of Love. If you want your plant to grow strong and healthy, you spend time with it, learn what it needs, and care for it even if it gets sick. You do your best to make sure it will survive. We are all like that plant, we are also like the growers who lovingly watch over them.

 

Sincerely, Sb

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Letterhead954 Advanced Member

Letterhead954

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Silverblue... :goodjob: Your knowledge and wisdom amazes me. Your posts should be pinned so more people could read them. You presented the perfect attitude for those who want a happy, healthy relationship. If I can copy and paste your posts, I'm going to do so for future reference, and so my 16 year old daughter can read them. Maybe you should be a counselor! I've been to counselors, as I too have been through failed relationships, but I've never heard a counselor say the things you have. Thank you!

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Silverblue Advanced Member

+Silverblue

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Silverblue... :goodjob: Your knowledge and wisdom amazes me. Your posts should be pinned so more people could read them. You presented the perfect attitude for those who want a happy, healthy relationship. If I can copy and paste your posts, I'm going to do so for future reference, and so my 16 year old daughter can read them. Maybe you should be a counselor! I've been to counselors, as I too have been through failed relationships, but I've never heard a counselor say the things you have. Thank you!

Thank you very much. I really appreciate your compliments. If what I say helps anyone, including your daughter, I'm very glad to share it. After having some failed relationships, not just marriage, I learned what not to do. Communication is so important. We have to be honest with ourselves and each other. We can't assume anything. People are afraid to talk, and listen. If more people would listen, our community would be in a better situation and the world would be a much better place. The most important to listen to is our Intuition. I've helped people learn how to do that better. It can save a life. It's kept me out of danger, not listening put me in uncomfortable situations. I was lucky to get out with my life. I often wonder how will I know when the right person comes along? Answer: My heart will Know. Our heart and Intuition work together. Intuition is connected with a Higher Self that's conected with a Divine Source. That's how I see and feel about that. We all have Intuition, some say it's our conscience.

 

I wanted to be a counselor but it didn't happen, so I just do it in my own way as a friend. Others have said I should be a counselor, too. As long as I can take my own advice, too, I'm ok.

 

Sincerely, Sb

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Silverblue Advanced Member

+Silverblue

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Ahhhh Love, what an illusion, talked about, sung about, written about, people kill for love, many have died for lack of it, an ever elusive wandering minstrel who sometimes thinks it's ok to love the one they're with, love is blind, love should be freely given, love is NOT lust, love is pure. love is respect, caring, sharing, friendship, honesty, sincerity, compassion, gentleness; Love someone but don't cling too tightly, hold on ever so gently. Love is the answer, what the world needs now is love, love is blue, love is a stranger, they say that felling in love is wonderful, love heals, all you need is love, love is all I have, it's most effective when shared, love is a flower, though I don't believe the words, "you're nobody till somebody loves you." Love is not a game, I won't be your puppet, (though "I'm Your Puppet" is a cute song). Love me tender, love me do, I can't help but fall in love with you. The idea of romance is wonderful, remember to keep the romance alive even after you're married. For those who have love, count your Blessings. Love isn't just a state of mind, it's a way of being. Be the love you seek, be the person you need, let Love guide in all you think, say, feel, and do. It's easier said than done, especially in this cold, cruel world, but that Light of Love must Always shine. Love shouldn't be conditional, Love is a Gift, never take it for granted. I can only give you Love that lasts forever, that's all, unless your name is Arthur Itis. 'lol'.

 

Sb

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Silverblue Advanced Member

+Silverblue

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We're here but some people aren't comfortable sending a pic to a stranger, no offense. When we get to know someone we might feel more comfortable. It'd help to know what someone's looking for, if you don't wanna go public with that, it's understandable but since some require a pic I hope there'll be someone who might give it a try. Maybe give a few details here, like, what age preference, general details that someone can have an idea. Do you want a serious relationship or just friendship, if serious, do you wanna get married or just live together? Do you want children, do you have children, if your potential mate already has a child, is that OK? Some people may not be able to bear a child but may be open to adoption, some people think of their pets as their children and that's all they want. Keep the communication open and honest, take time to get to know someone, read their messages, our words tell a lot about who we are; they're more important than what we look like. How important are these things to you?

 

Sb

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  • 4 weeks later...
big bud Advanced Member

big bud

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I'm a 30 year old male in Ann arbor 6 ft 235 redhead looking to make friends long before a relationship I like the outdoors camping kayaking hiking would do.you must love kids because I love my duaghters nothing like baggage but I have to put it out there. Im looking for friends all shapes and sizes ages not a thing not looking for anyone under 25 i like joking around and try not to take life to serious.I would love to go to dinner as friends or chat online feeling comfortable is a must. Maybee I can find the one or they can find me.

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